FRIDAY'S SCRIPT TIP:
SYMBOLIC DIALOGUE
One of the problems with Skip Wood's
SWORDFISH is corny dialogue between Hugh Jackman and his
daughter. This is the most critical relationship in the entire
film - it's Jackman's motivation to commit an escalating series
of crimes - so we have to believe in it. If the relationship
feels false, the whole movie crumbles. The problem is, in scene
after scene he's hugging her and telling her that he loves her.
That wouldn't seem like a problem in the real world, but in the
REEL world it becomes overkill. We have redundant information.
Hugging his daughter SHOWS that he loves her, so TELLING her that
he loves her makes it seem as if the writer is using a
sledgehammer to make his point.
I haven't read the original script, so it's possible this
problem was created by bad development instead of the
screenwriter... but that's even worse! Development is supposed to
make scripts BETTER, not destroy their credibility.
If you SHOW that he loves her, he needs to SAY something
else... but what?
That's where "symbolic dialogue" comes in. Find a detail that
symbolizes their love and talk about that instead.
Jackman tells his daughter he wants her to live with him, and
it comes off On The Nose and redundant. Why not have her ask if
he has room for her dolls? A conversation about his daughter's
dolls might be playful and fun... yet really be about how much he
loves her and how he would do anything to have her live with
him.
(Originally I was going to reprint a great scene from Steve
Tesich's BREAKING AWAY where Paul Dooley tells his son about
cutting the stones used to build the local college... but that
scene is so great I implore you to rent the movie. It's a great
film that few people remember today... with an Oscar Winning
screenplay.)
Instead of talking about Subject A, which would create obvious
dialogue, have your character talk about Subject B.
This can also work in creating unique "code phrases" for your
script. In an early scene in Mike Rich's FINDING FORESTER,
hoopkid Jamal Wallace
asks Sean Connery's William Forrester a question about soup
preparation... then follows up with a personal question. Connery
doesn't say "That question is too personal, I don't want to
answer it because we don't know each other well enough for me to
divulge that information", he says, "That's not exactly a soup
question." From that point on the phrase "soup question" becomes
symbolic of prying personal questions that neither man feels
comfortable answering. It's a "code phrase" used in conversation
several more times in the movie. Not only does this make the
dialogue interesting and unique, it makes the audience feel like
an insider - we know the code!
Using "symbolic dialogue" keeps your character's words from
giving identical information as their actions and adds a new
level to the dialogue.
HOLIDAY BLOCK - older tips that haven't run for a while because site traffic is slow... look for a bunch of NEW tips at the beginning of the year!
MY BLOG!
SCRIPT SECRETS STORE
Top 10 Films About Underpants T Shirt: SALE $9.99
Are you skipping NINJA ASSASSIN and waiting for NINJA SCHOOL MUSICAL?
Did you moon the line waiting to buy tickets to the new TWILIGHT movie?
Wonder if there will ever be a double bill of WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE and WILD THINGS?
Be heard:
Movie Discussion!
RECESSION SALE! $5 OFF!
CLASSES ON CD! Five Classes are ready to ship on audio CD: GUERRILLA MARKETING YOUR SCRIPT: NO AGENT? NO PROBLEM!, WRITING HORROR, WRITING THRILLERS (2 CD set), WRITING INDIES and IDEAS & CREATIVITY. Classes on CD - Click Here!
WRITING HORROR - The essentials of a horror screenplay - what do ROSEMARY'S BABY, NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, THE EXORCIST, BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN, THE OTHERS and OPEN WATER have in common? This class will tell you! All of the critical elements necessary to write a script that scares the pants off the audience. Writing Horror is $10.00 (plus $5 S&H).
IDEAS AND CREATIVITY - 80 minute CD packed with information. Tools to find ideas that are both personal *and* commercial. Hollywood wants scripts with High Concept stories... but not stupid scripts. Developing *intelligent* high concept ideas. How to turn your personal story into a blockbuster - or find your personal story in a high concept idea. Brainstorming and being creative. Ideas and Creativity is $10.00 (plus $5 S&H)
WRITING INDIES - Writing an Indie film? This class covers everything you need to know - from Central Locations to Confined Cameos. Using examples from SWINGERS, THE COOLER, STATION AGENT and others, this 80 minute CD is packed with information. How Indoe films challenge the audience (while mainstream films reassure the audience). Structures, using BOYS DON'T CRY, RUN LOLA RUN, HILARY & JACKIE, and others as example. Writing for a budget, writing for non-actors, getting the most production value out of your budget. Writing Indies is $10.00 (plus $5 S&H)
** NEW ** - Shopping Cart and Postage & Handling Discount on multiple CD orders! Save as much as $40!*
Click here for more information on CLASS CDs!
* Order all Classic CD Classes and save $5 on each (recession sale) plus $15 in postage = $40.
This is the program that I use. Very simple - I still haven't read the instruction book. When I first bought the program, I had sold a script and got an assignment - and decided to go from my macro to an actual screenwriting program. I went into The Writer's Store and asked for the easiest to use program they had, and that was MM. I started writing that assignment without ever reading the instruction book! One key stroke does *everything*. Automatically formats your script, putting character names, scene headings, and action in the appropriate places. It also has a character name list, so you only have to hit the first letter of any character's name and it automatically fills it in. The other great thing (at least for me) is that Movie Magic also makes the most used programs for budgeting and scheduling films - and all a producer has to do is import your script to the budgeting program! Makes it easier if your script is actually being produced. If you're looking for a screenwriting program, this is the one I recommend.
Buy It!
